#BookReview: THE BIRDS OF OPULENCE by Crystal Wilkinson

Mother-daughter relationships can be complex. They always have been and always will be. Some mothers place their hopes and dreams in their daughters and when those daughters fall short of the mark, they bear the burden of their mother’s disappointment. Other daughters thrive and their mothers see them as competition to be cut down. Still, there are mothers that want only the best for their daughters and cheer the loudest for their accomplishments, no matter how big or small.

Mama Minnie doesn’t suffer fools, so in 1943 when her 13 year old daughter Tookie comes up pregnant, Minnie is sure it’s her fault and nothing Tookie or anyone else says is going to change her mind. Tookie births Lucy, a fragile woman that loses herself birthing Yolanda, the story’s narrator. Through Yolanda’s eyes, readers are given a front row view into the complicated relationship between Minnie and Tookie, and Lucy’s with Yolanda in the small Kentucky town of Opulence.

From the outside looking in, the Goode women are to be envied. Francine Clark knows that there is love in her neighbor’s house while she has none. A recent widow, she longs for someone or something to love. When she finds herself pregnant, she’s too happy to worry about what the women in her small town will say about her blessed event.

While Birds mostly focuses on the women in the story, Joe Brown is a strong and welcome presence. A solid man from the city, he marries Lucy and into this family of opinionated Kentucky women. He brings a sense of stability to the Goode women. Francine’s daughter, Mona, and Yolanda are best of friends, but Mona doesn’t have a Joe Brown in her home, so she seeks attention in the wrong places and from the wrong people, soaking up as much of Joe Brown’s goodness as she can when she’s visiting.

As Wilkinson takes us through the twists and turns of small town living, I was especially entranced by the Dinner on the Grounds, an annual homecoming of sorts. Everyone returns to Opulence, including Tookie’s brothers, June and Butter, men who’ve escaped Opulence and the constant gaze of Mama Minnie. She dotes on them in a way that she’s never done for Tookie. As the saying goes, mothers love their sons and raise their daughters. But these men she’s raised are greedy and their visit leaves the family at odds with each other.

Crystal Wilkinson has a way with words that will remind readers of J. California Cooper and Bernice McFadden. My only regret is that we don’t get to see enough of adult Yolanda or Kee Kee (her brother). He plays such a minor role as a child, so it’s odd that he becomes so prominent toward the end of the book. At just 208 pages, surely more of his story and his relationship with Yolanda and his wife could have been fleshed out. But overall I enjoyed this read and I’ll definitely take a glance at Wilkinson’s back catalog and catch up on her previous works.

208 p.
Published: March 2016
Disclaimer: Copy of book received from publisher, opinions are my own.

Purchase: Amazon | B & N | Book Depository | IndieBound

#BookReview: DIAMOND HEAD by Cecily Wong

I love a good generational story and Diamond Head does not disappoint. The “present day” setting is 1964 Hawaii, but the narrator takes us on a journey to 1909 China, the Boxer Rebellion and the bombing of Pearl Harbor. It’s interesting that of the stories Theresa, the narrator, tells, hers is the one we know least. Her focus is on her parents, Amy and Bohai, and grandparents, Frank and Lin.

A wealthy shipping magnate in China, Frank Leong partners with Germans, Americans and any partnership that is financially beneficial to him. When his brother, Shen, loses his life in the Boxer Rebellion, Frank and Lin take in Hong, Shen’s wife, who becomes the keeper of all family secrets. When it becomes too dangerous for the Leongs to stay in China, Frank relocates them to Oahu. It is there that the stories of Bohai, his eldest son, and Kaipo, the youngest son, unfold.

Extremely shy and not at all the outgoing, boisterous eldest son that Frank hoped for, Bohai prefers to stick to his books. What he lacks in personality, Kaipo more than makes up for it. There isn’t a person that meets Kaipo that doesn’t fall under his spell, including Frank, leaving little room for Bohai.

Amy lives in near squalor on the island with her parents and a number of siblings. A photography assignment takes her to the home of the wealthy Leongs and she soon finds herself swept up in the possibility of what a life with Leong money and philanthropic fame could look like for herself and her family. “The parable of the red string of fate, the cord which binds one intended beloved to her perfect match, also punishes for mistakes in love, passing a destructive knot down the family line.” By no means is Amy the first in her family or the Leong family to disregard fate and, like others, she suffers for it.

Hong, the modest and reserved observer, watches all. She’s companion, caregiver and comforter to each member of the family at some point. It’s Hong who has known Lin the longest and Hong who takes care of her when she begins to unravel.

As Theresa tells her family’s story, we learn that she is pregnant and unwed and has little to no contact with her unborn child’s father. While Amy is angry at her for getting pregnant, I had to wonder if her anger is because she thought Theresa would get to have the loving marriage that she didn’t. Theresa, on the other hand, resents her mother for how distant she was from her father, Bohai. How could Amy set an example of what marriage should look like when Theresa witnessed her trying to escape hers daily?

Diamond Head is so good, so so good. Cecily Wong has created some unforgettable characters. I’d hesitate to call this historical fiction, though the characters do dip their toes into quite a bit of history. Overall, it’s just a good book. I’d recommend it for people that love generational sagas.

320pp
Published: April 2015

#BookReview: Mom & Me & Mom - Maya Angelou

The average person knows that she wrote I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings or they remember her inaugural speech for President Clinton, On the Pulse of Morning. You may know her for her poetic stylings in Still I Rise or for the younger generation, as an elder in Tyler Perry movies.

Readers, I'm here to tell you that Madame Angelou has lived! I picked up her then complete collection as a freshmen in college 20 years ago and was blown away. The books shown below cover her life from the beginning with I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings (1969); the ages 17 through 19 as a single mother working as a prostitute and madam in a brothel in Gather Together in My Name (1974); Singin' and Swingin' and Gettin' Merry Like Christmas (1976) covers her marriage to a Greek sailor, her dance career (did you know she once partnered with THE Alvin Ailey), and the recording of her first album.

The Heart of A Woman (1981) reflects on her time as a member of the noted Harlem Writer's Guild; her time in Egypt and Ghana; her close friendship with Malcolm X; and raising a black man in America. All God's Children Need Traveling Shoes (1986) finds her back in the United States working as a songwriter for Roberta Flack, writing short stories and preparing for her role in Alex Haley's Roots miniseries.

In her latest, Mom & Me & Mom, she finally touches upon the backbone of her greatness.  If you're like me, you remember that in I Know Why... she mentions being raised by her grandmother in Arkansas, briefly mentioning her time in California with her mother and then jumps straight into being an adult.  There is so much that was missing and it's covered now.

With a mother like Vivian Baxter, I don't know how Maya Angelou could have been anything but great.  There's nothing like a mother's love and Vivian stood in the gap for Maya like no one else could.  The confidence she instilled in Maya at a young age and support she continued to give her throughout her life was just amazing.  Not only did she serve as a sounding board and backbone for her daughter, she served as one for her communities.  She was a truly amazing woman for her time and Maya came by her spunk honestly.

When I tell you Madam Angelou has lived a full life, she truly has. As an impressionable young woman, I was so blown away by her story. Recounting now all that she has done in the time period that's not even covered by these books is even more stunning. My hope is that you will take the time  to read all of her autobiographies and get to know and appreciate this woman who is truly an American treasure.

224pp
Published: April 2013
Disclaimer: Copy of book received from publisher, opinions are my own.

 

Theme: Tell Mama by Etta James

#BookReview: The Supremes at Earl's All-You-Can-Eat - Edward Kelsey Moore

Friends for over 40 years, Odette, Clarice and Barbara Jean have seen each other through everything.  From forbidden love to a cheating husband, the Supremes have been there for each other. And if one of them got out of hand, the other two were there to steer her back on course.

Unlike THE Supremes, Odette, Clarice and Barbara Jean aren’t singers. They’re just friends that happen to reside in the same small Indiana town. But Big Earl, owner of Earl’s All-You-Can-Eat diner, gave them the front window spot while they were in high school and, from there, they’ve watched over and gossiped about the comings and goings of Plainview, Indiana residents for decades.

The plainest and rowdiest of the group, Odette is a no nonsense kind of woman and always has been. If anyone knew that she had conversations with her dead mother, they’d think she was losing a few screws. If they knew that her mother’s ghost hangs out with Eleanor Roosevelt’s, they’d lock her away for sure.

As teens, Clarice’s cheating boyfriend Richmond, now her cheating husband, had a hard time finding someone to double date with because Clarice’s mother insisted she bring Odette along. But, as the saying goes, there’s a pot for every lid and James fit Odette to a tee. Clarice never would have imagined that her homely friend would wind up in a more successful marriage. She never imagined she’d be married at all.

Growing up poor, and with the skankiest mother in town, Barbara Jean vows that she’s going to have a much better life. Rescued from a future that was starting to resemble her mother’s, by the Supremes and Lester, her much older husband, Barbara Jean has been on a slippery slope for the longest. Clarice and Odette see it for what it is, but are too polite to say anything.

These were the tender considerations that came with being a member of the Supremes.We overlooked each other’s flaws and treated each other well, even when we didn’t deserve it.

When one of the Supremes becomes ill, not only is she forced to confront some truths, the others are as well. While the results may not be pretty, you can guarantee that the path they take to get there is pretty entertaining. As Sophia stated in The Color Purple, “things gone be different around here from now on.” Indeed, they are.

352pp
Published: March 2013
Disclaimer: Copy of book received from publisher, opinions are my own.

 

Theme: With a Little Help From My Friends by Ike & Tina Turner

#BookReview: Sister of My Heart - Chitra Banerjee Divakaruni

Sudha and Anju aren't sisters by blood, yet in the true sense of the word, they're sisters and more.  Raised in the same house by their widowed mothers, the girls grow up believing that they're cousins.  To say that they cannot live without each other is an understatement and, by their actions, often prove that they love each other more than they love themselves.

The beautiful Sudha has always dreamed of having a family, but only after college and once she's established herself as a designer.  Studious Anju loves the literary classics.  She wants nothing more than to run the family bookstore once she's completed her degree.  Love and marriage are for the beautiful people like Sudha, all Anju needs is books and enough money to remove some of the stress her mother has carried on her shoulders for so many years.

But as the saying goes, "the best laid plans of mice and men go astray," and neither Sudha nor Anju finds herself leading the life she'd planned.  Misunderstandings and a lack of communication drive a wedge between the formerly inseparable sisters.  Unbeknownst to them, the fracture in their symbiotic relationship affects all of their decisions, ultimately leading them to conclude that without their other half, their lives are incomplete.

Sister of My Heart is a beautiful tale of friendship.  It was heartbreaking to see the two struggle for so long needlessly.  Sudha spends her life trying to right wrongs she believes her father did to Anju's father.  Anju spends her adult years resenting Sudha for something Sudha can't control and is unaware of.  The story has so many twists and turns, you won't be able to put it down until you're done.

322pp
Published: January 1999

Theme: Always Sisters by Cece Winans

#BookReview: Bird of Paradise: How I Became Latina - Raquel Cepeda #BP2W (Dominican Republic)

Globetrotting journalist Raquel Cepeda takes readers around the world from New York to the Dominican Republic to Morocco and back again in Bird of Paradise: How I Became Latina.  If ever there was a book that meets the guidelines for the Books: Passports to the World challenge, this is it.  There's a lot of information to digest within the pages, but it's well worth the read.

Born the daughter of an idealistic mother and an unaffectionate father, the young Raquel spends much of her time trying to figure out where she fits.  That applies to both her home life, which is turbulent, and, later, her school life.  Upon being sent to the Dominican Republic to be raised by her grandparents following her parent's divorce, her childhood happiness peaks.  Her mother brings her back to the States, a puzzling decision since she seems to have no use for her, where she witnesses domestic violence on a daily basis.  Eventually, Raquel is sent to her father and stepmother in New York, and they seem to have little use for her either.  Verbally abused by her father, and occasionally a victim of domestic violence, Raquel merely bides her time until she can leave for college.

While most teens seek solace in her friends and classmates, the author finds little comfort there either.  In America, there is a tendency to categorize people.  We want people to fit into a "checkable" box.  As a daughter of the diaspora, Raquel felt a kindred connection to other people of color, but for her black classmates, she was too white and for her white classmates, she was too black.  So there was a separation by skin tone and even more, a separation between those Dominican students who had been in America for a while and those who had recently emigrated.

I believe that everything happens for a reason and after reading this book, I think Cepeda does too.  Her childhood and young adult experiences eventually lead her on a journey to find out more about her family's ancestry.  While she could go the genealogical route, she's more interested in finding out where her people originated.  Yes, they ended up in the Dominican Republic, but how did they get there? What is their ethnic origin? What is the history of relations between Africa and the island? And why does she feel so drawn to una india, an Amerindian or Indigenous-American spiritual guide?

Occasionally I have a-ha moments with books, I had quite a few with Bird of Paradise.  The one that stands out most is the whitening of the country.  While Hitler was killing Jews in Europe, Rafael Trujillo was doing the same to Haitians, sanctioning the killing of 20,000 Haitians in what became known as the Parsley Massacre.  To further whiten his nation, he encouraged Europeans, those fleeing Hitler especially, to emigrate to the Dominican Republic.  Trujillo's suppression of all things African was continued by his successors up until 1996.

Another a-ha moment came as I read about the fluidity of race in the Dominican Republic.  The U.S. has long practiced the one drop rule, in which one drop of African/African-American blood means you're black. In the DR, it is the opposite.  One sixteenth of white blood means you're white.  Darker Dominicans who have attained a higher financial or social status can be deemed white as well.  Fascinating stuff indeed.

So I know I've rambled on much longer in this review than usual, but it's the perfect blend of storytelling and science.  It's a fascinating read for all of my genealogical/anthropological readers, as well as my memoir readers.  It should be noted that there are phrases sprinkled throughout in Spanish, but that shouldn't dissuade you from reading it.  Some of them are translated, others are not.  If you have a basic knowledge of any of the romance languages, you should be able to infer what is being said.



336pp
Published: March 2013
Disclaimer: Copy of book received from publisher, opinions are my own.

The Dominican Republic has long been viewed primarily as an exporter of sugar, coffee, and tobacco, but in recent years the service sector has overtaken agriculture as the economy's largest employer, due to growth in telecommunications, tourism, and free trade zones. The economy is highly dependent upon the US, the destination for more than half of exports. - CIA World Factbook

Location: Caribbean, eastern two-thirds of the island of Hispaniola, between the Caribbean Sea and the North Atlantic Ocean, east of Haiti
Size: 48,670 sq km; slightly more than twice the size of New Hampshire
Ethnic groups: Mixed 73%, white 16%, black 11%
Languages: Spanish (official)
Population: 10,088,598

Anthem: Quisqueyanos valientes

#BookReview: Faceless - Amma Darko #BP2W (Ghana)

If I've learned nothing else in the first few months of this challenge, it's that women and girls around the world live difficult lives.  That's not to say that I didn't know that before, but it was never more obvious to me than when reading Amma Darko's Faceless.

Fourteen year old Fofo is a street child.  Like many children who live in an area referred to as Sodom and Gomorrah in Accra, Ghana, she's estranged from her family.  Unlike some of the children that have been put out on the streets to work, she voluntarily left home before she could be forced to.  Whether she left by force or her own volition is moot, because it's likely that the outcome would have been the same.

Growing up, Fofo saw her older brothers leave, and with them, most of the household income, and her older sister.  While her brothers left to pursue their own careers, Fofo's older sister, Baby T, left under cloudier circumstances.  And when Baby T is found murdered, Fofo is determined to help her new found friends find out what happened to her sister.

Amma Darko uses Faceless to touch on quite a few issues. The character Fofo deals with abandonment, while Baby T deals with molestation and prostitution.  Their mother, Maa Tsuru, the product of a single parent home seeks love and attention from men who use her.  With the character Kabria, the middle class agency worker who tries to assist Fofo, Darko highlights the difficulties in balancing the role of mother, wife and employee in a chauvinistic society.

The one thing that threw me was the way Darko interjected the AIDS conversation into the story line.  There was a missed opportunity for Kabria to have a conversation with her oldest daughter about AIDS and sexually transmitted diseases that was not fleshed out.  It was obvious that she wanted to get the message out, and I applaud her for that, but the ways in which she did it did not flow well with the story and instead of being well integrated, they read as commercial-like PSAs in the middle of a skit. 

236pp
Published: January 1996

Formed from the merger of the British colony of the Gold Coast and the Togoland trust territory, Ghana in 1957 became the first sub-Saharan country in colonial Africa to gain its independence.  Ghana's economy has been strengthened by a quarter century of relatively sound management, a competitive business environment, and sustained reductions in poverty levels.

Location: Western Africa, bordering the Gulf of Guinea, between Cote d'Ivoire and Togo
Size: 238,533 sq km; slightly smaller than Oregon
Population: 24,652,402 
Ethnic groups: Akan 47.5%, Mole-Dagbon 16.6%, Ewe 13.9%, Ga-Dangme 7.4%, Gurma 5.7%, Guan 3.7%, Grusi 2.5%, Mande-Busanga 1.1%, other 1.6%
Languages: Asante 14.8%, Ewe 12.7%, Fante 9.9%, Boron (Brong) 4.6%, Dagomba 4.3%, Dangme 4.3%, Dagarte (Dagaba) 3.7%, Akyem 3.4%, Ga 3.4%, Akuapem 2.9%, other (includes English (official)) 36.1%

 

Anthem: God Bless Our Homeland Ghana

#BookReview: Maman's Homesick Pie - Donia Bijan #BP2W (Iran)

Prior to the Islamic Revolution in 1978, Donia Bijan and her family lived a charmed life in Iran.  You can hear the pride in her words as she writes of her doctor father and nurse mother who built a hospital from the ground up.  Raised in an apartment above the hospital, Donia and her sisters were raised not only by their parents, but by the nurses at the hospital as well.

Even as she plays the role of nurse and mother, Maman (I don't recall the author ever giving her actual name) also takes on women's issues and politics.  Not only does she serve on the board of several organizations fighting for women's rights, she becomes the director of Tehran's first nursing school and serves in parliament.  While all of these actions are notable, they also prove to be a factor in her family's exile from Iran.

Spanning her family's time first in Iran, then in Spain and finally in America (with an interlude in France), Maman's Homesick Pie is as much a love letter to the author's mother as it is a cookbook.  While her father wanted Donia to be a doctor, and was quite disappointed that she was not, her mother encouraged her love of cooking from a young age and went to great lengths to make sure her daughter could achieve her dream.

The end of each chapter includes a recipe or two that ties back to something the author has mentioned in that chapter.  She includes an anecdote about her mother or why she or her mother created the recipe.  Though some of the recipes didn't necessarily appeal to me, I did find myself dog-earing a few pages for recipes I definitely plan to go back and try.

254pp
Published: October 2011
Disclaimer: Copy of book received from publisher, opinions are my own.

Known as Persia until 1935, Iran became an Islamic republic in 1979 after the ruling monarchy was overthrown and Shah Mohammad Reza Pahlavi was forced into exile.  Conservative clerical forces established a theocratic system of government with ultimate political authority vested in a learned religious scholar referred to commonly as the Supreme Leader who, according to the constitution, is accountable only to the Assembly of Experts - a popularly elected 86-member body of clerics. - CIA World Factbook

Location: Middle East, bordering the Gulf of Oman, the Persian Gulf, and the Caspian Sea, between Iraq and Pakistan
Size: 1,648,195 sq km; slightly smaller than Alaska
Population: 78,868,711
Ethnic groups: Persian 61%, Azeri 16%, Kurd 10%, Lur 6%, Baloch 2%, Arab 2%, Turkmen and Turkic tribes 2%, other 1%
Languages: Persian (official) 53%, Azeri Turkic and Turkic dialects 18%, Kurdish 10%, Gilaki and Mazandarani 7%, Luri 6%, Balochi 2%, Arabic 2%, other 2%

 

Anthem: Soroud-e Melli-ye Jomhouri-ye Eslami-ye Iran (National Anthem of the Islamic Republic of Iran)

 

#BookReview: Daughters Who Walk This Path - Yejide Kilanko #BP2W (Nigeria)

No one told us that sometimes evil is found much closer to home, and that those who want to harm us  can have the most soothing and familiar of voices.

As a child, Morayo and her sister Eniayo loved visits from their older cousin, Bros T.  A gifted storyteller, everyone recognized that he lied effortlessly, still, there was really no harm in his lies. But as the saying goes, if you'll lie, you'll steal.  The day money goes missing, Bros T swears he hasn't taken it, lying to both his overindulging mother and his disbelieving grandmother.  It's then that Mama Ejiwunmi recognizes that her grandson is a bad seed.


Expulsion from school and pleas from Aunty Tope result in Bros T taking up residence in the Bassey household and begin Morayo's descent into her own private hell.  While Bros T's molestation of Morayo only takes up a few pages in the book, it is really her life after and the decisions she makes as a result of living with the shame that make up the bulk of Daughters Who Walk This Path.

This book could have been about any variety of topics.  In fact, within the first few pages, I thought there was a chance that it would focus on albinism, since much is made of Eniayo's birth and the realization that she is an albino.  Knowing that albinos in Nigeria often face discrimination, Kilanko had the opportunity to touch on that.  Beyond a few comments about Eniayo being teased in school, no mention is made of it.

Instead, Daughters focuses on the repercussions that women live with when they're not allowed to make their own decisions about their bodies and who is allowed access to them.  As the men that have violated them go through life carefree, the women are the ones that deal with mistrust, feelings of inadequacy and a host of other things that prohibit them from fully engaging in meaningful relationships.  Though Morayo and her aunt Morenike are victims of similar situations, how they choose to deal with life after and which paths they choose differ greatly.

Remember that others have walked this path before you and now balance babies on their backs.  Daughters, yours will not be an exception.

352pp
Published: January 2013

Theme: No One Like You by P Square

#BookReview: The Autobiography of My Mother - Jamaica Kincaid #BP2W (Dominica)

Xuela Claudette Richardson is born the daughter of a Carib woman and a Scottish/African father.  Her mother died during childbirth and the reader is reminded of this, seemingly, at least once a chapter.  The lack of a mother frames all of Xuela's thoughts and she seems to use it as an excuse for how she lives her life. Choosing not to love anyone, not even her father, Xuela comes across as a bitter and lonely individual.

While I know Jamaica Kincaid's work is hailed in certain circles, this book left me exhausted.  The repeated statement about Xuela's mother's death, her disregard and dislike for everyone around her and the supernatural undercurrent wore me out.  The author dwelled entirely too long in childhood and I eagerly anticipated her growing up and maturing.  Instead, I was treated to a rude, older version of the same character.

Initially I picked this book because I thought I might learn something of Dominican culture; however, short of the story being set in Dominica, there was little to learn of the country from the words of the author.  Since I'm obligated to read a book from a different country each week, it was too late to turn back and try another book once I was 50 pages into this one.  But given the opportunity, I would have preferred a different book.







228pp
Published: January 1997

Dominica was the last of the Caribbean islands to be colonized by Europeans due chiefly to the fierce resistance of the native Caribs. France ceded possession to Great Britain in 1763, which made the island a colony in 1805. In 1980, two years after independence, Dominica's fortunes improved when a corrupt and tyrannical administration was replaced by that of Mary Eugenia Charles, the first female prime minister in the Caribbean, who remained in office for 15 years. Some 3,000 Carib Indians still living on Dominica are the only pre-Columbian population remaining in the eastern Caribbean. - CIA World Factbook


Location: Caribbean, island between the Caribbean Sea and the North Atlantic Ocean, about half way between Puerto Rico and Trinidad and Tobago
Size: 751 sq km, slightly more than four times the size of Washington, DC
Population: 73,126
Ethnic groups: Black 86.8%, mixed 8.9%, Carib Amerindian 2.9%, white 0.8%, other 0.7%
Languages: English (official), French patois

Theme: Isle of Beauty  

#BookReview: Zenzele: A Letter for my Daughter - J. Nozipo Maraire #BP2W (Zimbabwe)

"When independence came, we celebrated with tears in our eyes.  We would continue the struggle to ensure that our children received every opportunity of Western privilege...There was nothing that our children asked for that we denied them.  We who had grown up knowing only deprivation, austerity and hard labor.  We wanted only the best for them.  We even sent them to the best private schools with plenty of whites... But it was all in vain.  They have neither respect nor gratitude....these modern children are culturally bleached."

As Zenzele announces her intentions to leave Harare, Zimbabwe for the halls of Harvard, her mother reflects on life lessons that her daughter must know before she leaves for the states.  As the eldest of five children raised by a widowed mother, Zenzele's mother, Shiri, never had the privilege of thinking about global warming or worrying about the starving in Ethiopia.  After all, Zenzele has grown up in Zimbabwe, not Rhodesia, as her mother had.  Shiri is impressed and in awe of this daughter that protests inhumane treatment of others and petitions foreign governments.

Through the letter her mother writes to her, readers are treated to a history of Rhodesia and the fight for independence that resulted in Zimbabwe.  Interesting to note is Shiri's lament that what was envisioned as successful post-colonial life was rooted mostly in material success.  In the rush to claim what colonialists had, the new Zimbabwe adapted the British culture and began to reject their own.

As the children of Zimbabwe go abroad to study, there's the fear that they won't return, as one of Shiri's cousins did, and if they do return, they will have completely forgotten their roots and culture.  The hope is always that they go out in the world and absorb what they can from other cultures and bring it back to their country and continent.  Though she's proud of her, Zenzele's leaving is Shiri's biggest dream and potential nightmare.

I loved this book because even though it was a history lesson, it didn't feel like one.  So many of the lessons that Shiri passes on to Zenzele, and so many of the experiences she speaks about, are similar to those that all mothers pass on their daughters.  Others are lessons that I recognize as those passed on to me, that seem race-specific as an African-American, that I've also passed on to my daughter.  Things such as how to react when you're mistaken for a store clerk when you're obviously not dressed in the store uniform or being talked down to because the assumption is that your skin color means you're intellectually inferior..

There are so many lovely features that shall make you conspicuous among the flock.  One of these is your color.  In our country, you are accustomed to every shade from caramel to charcoal.  Overseas, they do not have an eye for our rainbow.  To them, we are all one burdensome color: black...Let no one define you or your country.

I could go on and on about all of the great nuggets of wisdom that Shiri imparts on Zenzele, but I'm really hoping you'll pick this up and give it a read for yourself.  I can promise you that you won't be disappointed.  And as Bill Cosby used to say on Fat Albert, "You just might learn something."

208pp
Published: April 1997

The UK annexed Southern Rhodesia from the [British] South Africa Company in 1923. A 1961 constitution was formulated that favored whites in power. In 1965 the government unilaterally declared its independence, but the UK did not recognize the act and demanded more complete voting rights for the black African majority in the country (then called Rhodesia). UN sanctions and a guerrilla uprising finally led to free elections in 1979 and independence (as Zimbabwe) in 1980. Robert Mugabe, the nation's first prime minister, has been the country's only ruler (as president since 1987) and has dominated the country's political system since independence. - CIA World Factbook

Location: Southern Africa, between South Africa and Zambia
Size: 390,757 sq km, slightly larger than Montana
Population: 12,619,600
Ethnic groups: African 98% (Shona, 82%, Ndebele 14%, other 2%), mixed and Asian 1%, white less than 1%
Languages: English (official), Shona, Sindebele, numerous but other minor tribal dialects

Theme: Blessed Be the Land of Zimbabwe

#BookReview: Loving Donovan - Bernice L. McFadden

When you choose to love someone, you agree to take on all of their baggage, knowingly or not.  The day Campbell chose to love Donovan was the day she took on the voice of ghost in his head, a domineering and ever present grandmother in his ear and a life time of watching his father just exist.  Indeed, Campbell took on much more than she knew.

Growing up, Campbell watched her father cheat on and leave his wife for another family.  As a teen mother, Campbell watched her daughter's father leave her.  As an adult, Campbell watched her best friend give herself away because the man she loved didn't love her enough.  With all those factors working against her, it would be easy to write off men, to write off love altogether.  Yet Campbell still believes in love and, though she's hesitant to seek it for herself, she's willing to take a chance.

Donovan had no business looking for love.  In all fairness, it feels like he knew that, but then he met Campbell and, for a time, logic and reasoning escaped him.  Everyone is entitled to love, but Donovan had things in his past he needed to work through before bringing anyone else into the picture.  Having been loved the wrong way in the past and the present, it's no wonder that he doesn't know how to accept being loved well and right.

Though both Donovan and Campbell come from "broken homes," Donovan's demons are more difficult to overcome.  In great part, it's because he's faced with one of them daily.  We often hear or experience mothers raising their daughters and loving their sons.  One of Donovan's biggest problems is that he's been raised by a weak father and an overbearing grandmother.  Shrouded in her love for Donovan is a need to keep him broken down enough to stay with her and, should he find the strength to leave, playing on his insecurities and fears enough to make him stay.  I find fault with Solomon, Donovan's father, as well, because its his weakness and his mother's forked tongue that is to blame for the demise of his marriage to Daisy and drives him and the young Donovan back to his mother's home.

The underlying reason for Grammy keeping first Solomon and then Donovan so close to her is selfishness and her fear of being left.  Being domineering and demeaning drove her husband away, but that's not enough to make her change her ways.  Instead, she directs her attention at Solomon, at first building him up, only to break him down later when he dares to love Daisy.  And when Donovan dares to love Campbell, she steps in and begins to slowly whittle away at the confidence that Campbell's love has given Donovan, planting seeds of doubt.

I've spent this year going back and listening to McFadden works that I've previously read.  I've heard and learned something new from each book by listening that I didn't get from reading and Loving Donovan is no exception.  Perhaps it's because there's a tendency to skim pages when reading that you can't do when listening.  However you choose to, you absolutely must give McFadden's works a try.

226pp
Published: January 2003

Theme: Hello Like Before by Bill Withers

#BookReview: The Twelve Tribes of Hattie - Ayana Mathis

Is there a limit on the amount of love a parent can have for their child?  If you have more than one child, is it possible to have loved your other children so much that you have nothing left for the others?  Or is it just possible for life to beat you down so much so that you have nothing left to give your children except a place to stay, food to eat and a determination to survive?

I can't find fault with Hattie Shepherd.  Giving birth to your first children at the age of 19 in a new city can be overwhelming.  To find yourself giving birth years later at the age of 46 is surprising.  Then to turn around at 74 and find yourself mothering your grandchildren, is not an easy road.  But how do you explain that to your children who only see you as cold and uncaring?

"Somebody always wants something from me," she said in a near whisper.  "They're eating me alive."

As you read, you'll be caught up in the lives of Lloyd, the musician; Six, the wonder boy preacher; the high strung and insecure Alice, who pretends her brother Billups needs her when, in reality, she's the one that desperately needs him; Bell, who seeks revenge against Hattie when all she really wants is to know the secret joy her mother found once upon a time; and countless others.  Mathis dedicates chapters to the various offspring, but their interactions as children aren't explored as much as they are as adults.  She wants you to see who they've become as a result of living in the house.

I love the set up of the book.  It feels like a compilation of short stories that are loosely tied together, with the only common thread being that Hattie and August have given birth to them.  With the exception of Alice and Billups, we see very little interaction among the siblings once they leave home.  It's as if Hattie's lack of love spread to them and there's nothing that bonds any of them together.

Part of the great migration to the north, I wonder how much of Hattie's coldness is a reflection of her surroundings.  While her husband, August, longs for the Georgia he remembers, minus Jim Crow, Hattie refuses to even speak its name.  Still, you have to wonder if August lamenting over leaving the south is valid.  Would Hattie have been different, would the children have had different lives, had they been surrounded by paper shell pecans, sweet gum trees, gigantic peaches and neighbors whose names they could recite years later? 

256pp
Published: December 2012
Disclaimer: Copy of book received from publisher, opinions are my own.

 

Theme: A Song for Mama by Boyz II Men

#BookReview: Please Look After Mom - Kyung-Sook Shin

Would it take your mother's disappearance for you to realize how little you knew of her?

"Do you remember asking me a while ago to tell you something that only I knew about Mom? I told you I didn't know Mom.  All I knew was that Mom was missing.  It's the same now.  I especially don't know where her strength came from."

It's not until your wife goes missing that you even see her as your counterpart.

"Before you lost sight of your wife on the Seoul Station subway platform, she was merely your children's mother to you."

"Before she went missing, you spent your days without thinking about her.  When you did think about her, it was to ask her to do something, or to blame her or ignore her.  Habit can be a frightening thing.  You spoke politely with others, but your words turned sullen toward your wife.  Sometimes you even cursed at her.  You acted as if it had been decreed that you couldn't speak politely to your wife. That's what you did."

When 69 year old Park So-nyo goes missing, her husband and her children come to understand how little they knew of her and how much they took her for granted for so long.  Born into poverty, she married a man that she didn't know, or initially love, yet raised five children to become productive members of society.  Yet, like many adult children, she became an afterthought as they became successful, seen as an annoyance by some.

Still, their successes were all built firmly on the foundation that she set for them.  The eldest son for whom she saved and sacrificed to send to school; a younger daughter that was sent off to live with that same son to receive an even better education; the daughter who tries to manage being both a pharmacist and a mother to three, while wondering how Mom managed to raise five children and make it seem so easy and natural.

"Since she went missing, I often think: Was I a good daughter? Could I do the kind of things for my kids she did for me?  I know one thing.  I can't do it like she did.  Even if I wanted to.  When I'm feeding my kids, I often feel annoyed, burdened, as if they're holding on to my ankles.  I love my kids, and I am moved - wondering, did I really give birth to them?  But I can't give them my entire life like Mom did.  Depending on the situation, I act as if I would give them my eyes if they need them, but I'm not Mom."

Over the course of this short read, each member of the family reflects on the role Mom played in his/her life, realizing that not once did they see as anything other than their mother.  And as mothers sometimes do, she downplayed any problems she had the few times that anyone asked.  Ultimately, it's the inability to express her pain (and her family's willingness to overlook it) that leads to the disappearance of Park.

"So why did we think of Mom as a mom from the very beginning?  She didn't have the opportunity to pursue her dreams and, all by herself, faced everything the era dealt her, poverty and sadness, and she couldn't do anything about her very bad lot in life other than suffer through it and get beyond it and live her life to the very best of her ability, giving her body and her heart to it completely.

256pp
Published: April 2011

Theme: Acknowledgement by John Coltrane

#BookReview: Where Did We Go Wrong? - Monica Mathis-Stowe

Ahhh, to be young and dumb.  You couldn't pay me to go back to those days.  Reading Monica Mathis-Stowe's Where Did We Go Wrong? certainly did nothing to make me miss them.

Joy, Maxine and Gabby have been friends since their days at Morgan State University, though I'm unsure as to why Joy and Maxine have tolerated Gabby's foolishness for so long.  If you were to look up the word golddigger in the dictionary, you'd find a perfectly posed picture of Gabby.  And she's not ashamed of it either.

Never mind that she was in a relationship with a good man, when the opportunity to hook up with a pro football player came along, she hopped on it.  The day he signed a $ 75 million dollar contract was the day she stopped taking birth control.  The fact that he was already married with kids was just a small stumbling block.  When Gabby wanted something, nothing stood in her way.

Former teacher and current homemaker Maxine has the perfect family life, if you're on the outside looking in.  But she sees her attorney husband sinking them deeper into debt as he tries to keep up with the Joneses.  They can't afford their home, cars or any of the other luxury items he insists on.  Things would be much more manageable if he would allow her to go back to work, but Trent doesn't want the mother of his children to have to work, like his own mother did after leaving his abusive father.

Joy's fear of her mother has kept her from being truly happy.  Mind you, her mother isn't abusive, but she is very opinionated and, in her opinion, Joy has no business thinking about any man until she's completed her doctoral program.  She and her longtime boyfriend Allen have been sneaking around behind her mother's back since they were teens, but Allen is tired of being her secret.  If she can't be open about their relationship, he'd rather not be with her.

While Joy and Maxine seem to have each other's backs, they also have Gabby's, even though she's undeserving.  Joy and Maxine are likable enough characters, though Joy does make some rash decisions that I really questioned, but Gabby? This chick is the skankiest of all skanks.  The way she schemes and plots against others without any remorse is unconscionable.  Like Mitt Romney, even when it's obvious that she's playing a losing game, she continues to play it.  I don't know how the two of them tolerated her in college and beyond.

I'm eager to read the sequel to the book because I'm interested in finding out what happened with Joy and Maxine.  More than anything, I want to know if Gabby has changed at all and, if she hasn't, has karma finally slapped her in the face.  I can only hope so.

242pp
Published: May 2012

Theme: What About Your Friends by TLC